everyday with my son

Small stories of how it all went along

Archive for the tag “son”

Another year

Another year has passed that add another year to this blog. I started this when Kenzo is about a year and a half old and now he is to turn 7 by Oct and now we have Liam along with us.

Currently I am with Kenzo downstairs.  He is eating some snacks and watching Ryan Toy Review on youtube while Liam is upstairs taking a nap.

BTW, today is mum’s birthday and I think there would be some fancy dinner at the mall tonight.

Well, hope to edit all my previous post to make it readable but looking back at it it looks daunting.

Hope all will be good for another year. I hope for another trip and we are all exicited how the house will look like when it is done.

Ciao!

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Foreigner?

The Nana of Liam had been asked a countless of times, if Liam is a foreigner’s son or at least one of the parents are.  Liam has a different face and not very filipino, more Far eastern asian than south eastern. He can pass as a Chinese, Japanese or Korean and not very believable as a pinoy.

Some of the good points of Liam is his being pleasant and friendly, it seems he likes all people and would say “hi”, “bye”, “hello” to strangers automatically.

When he is dressed in real nice clothes I still always marveled how he look good, really, not because I am biased, but because really he is damn nice.

The Punisher

Du30 is nicknamed the punisher and now I am that at home. Lately, I see Kenzo misbehaving badly inside and outside our home. Before it is just his tantrums but now he sees Liam’s tantrums and now copying it. SO, he got a sort of a  combo tantrums for us to bear.

I really do want to go this route of punishing Kenzo but it looks like the western way of talking, reasoning with him like an adult is not really working and now I have to shift gears and try a harder route.

With Liam’s tantrums, we were able to handled it better because of what we learned from Kenzo, we now dont easily give-in to Liam’s demand, phew.

Now Kenzo’s attitude is getting harder for us to handle, it is difficult to handle Liam and will have to now also deal with Kenzo and add some tantrums to the mix, some dangerous physical play and bawling to the side  and we now got a day in hell, almost.

Lately, I ahve been trying a different way to stop Kenzo’s attitude and tries to punish him by staying with me in the room or locking him out of our room. It is kinda tough but what else do I do? I had tried a softer approach for many years but obviously it has not improved our situation. I hate to do this, I just prefer to wish that they both just acted with less fighting and to behave peacefully. But Kids are kids, their world is not like ours and they still have to learn how to deal with their emotions and how to handle themselves in public.

It is now a time for tough love or else I would not be able to succeed in making them, particularly kenzo, disciplined kids.

 

 

 

Menopause?

Lately, or the past few months, I noticed mum is at her menopause phase or maybe it is stress from what happened to momsie,  I don’t know but my wild guess it is menopausal.

Usually the house is mixed with occasional rough and scary tumble by the kids, a few mess here and there, a scratch, a loud wail. but when mum is here very seldom do we get peace. A simple chore will have some loud complaints with it, a missing bottle of lotion will be like missing a box of diamonds, an under-cooked cabbage, chicken etc can be like she was served a poison.

But that is not all, she complained of humidity even the weather is relatively cool. Even when the AC is on (though at about 25 degrees) she will complain as if she is being baked in an oven.

Truth is, there are no checklist on how to deal with menopausal women. It is just to be patient and kill yourself if you run out of it. Right now, I find all to be funny but in a few weeks it wont be that funny anymore.

Life is a bit on the tougher side now and it looks like it is about to go worst, good thing I still can laugh all the hate out plus I have a small room I can escape to when things got too loud… so far so good, at least.

 

 

 

 

US / Bay Area trip III

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Our last sunday was spent travelling to Napa Valley and we had our lunch in a fancy resto. It was a long drive and we were a bit tired from that trip, sadly  the  weather too did not cooperate as it was warm and humid.

The cool thing in Napa was the Castles we went to and of course the fancy restaurant Culinary Institute of America. I ordered a chicken burger, sandwich with biscuits instead of buns. In few times, me and Kenzo was able to race around the wide grass areas there and that was always fun.

The last weekdays was spent between Menlo, Playground, More Shopping and San Lorenzo plus some more Shopping. I also took advantage of our last few days by stuffing myself with KFC at Mountain View, which I think was the taste of the KFCs I used to eat when I was a kid.

I think what Kenzo wont forget was the playground hopping we did around Silicon Valley. It was pure fun and me being a dad it is one of the many things I am happy to do with Kenzo, sadly there are not many play areas here in PH. We  played  football, frisbee, tag etc… we were joined by Eric, Sam and Susie.  It was really fun and I enjoyed every part of it.

Kenzo left for San Lorenzo thursday night (after our picnic and play  in Atherton ). Kenzo and his mum was picked up by Rhea and that time when they were about to leave was really tough. Primarily, the last 3 days was spent playing with Sam, Eric and I. He really had a great time and when it was time to leave Menlo park Kenzo was very sad. He was really crying and would want to stay and play more. The saddest part was when he said goodbye and thank you to everyone and seeing him leave was painful. I knew I can never go back to the US and look at the playground again without Kenzo, it will be just too painful, I think his laughter, voices are still echoing  in my memory.

So I stayed with Susie for another day and on the next day I planned to pick up Kenzo (friday) so we can again play in the playground for 1  one more day but the whole morning and midday was wet, so  I ended up alone at Gilbert Ave and waited for Sam and Eric to get me afetr school and work.  At dinner time we wete at another fancy restaurant in Palo Alto  the Il Fornio to enjoy  afancy Italian dinner, right after they brought me to San Lorenzo at around 930 pm and saw them for the last time.

The last friday night was again a blast for Kenzo as his cousins were all there especailly Princess and his most favorite Jack. They gambol, hop, jump, run endlessly until after 12mn. It was indeed a perfect night to end Kenzo;s happy trip. And when all the kids were about to go home Kenzo cried a bit.

At San Lorenzo there was a bit of a party and the last hurrah I had when Chris and Reggie brought me to Gerry’s Grill in Union City. It was a melting pot of pinoys and fil-ams. We had beer and enjoy some music and chit-chats and that capped my last night.

Saturday, our last day, was another attempt to do more shopping. We went to nearby mall Bayfair in East Bay, San lorenzo just right after it opened.  We bought a few stuff and rode Uber on our way back.

The remaining hours from 1pm  to 6 pm was spent packing, weighing our boxes, fixing stuff and making our last check before we fly out.

At around 730 we started to get ready, haul our bags to the cars, say our goodbyes and thank yous. That was our last night and the end of  a great, great trip.

Hopefully, I can go back a few more times but from the looks of it I probably will not in the neat future or maybe never. But my trip to US was all have been great, some are tough because I am alone but overall it was surely best time of my life was spent there.

Of all my trips several to Australia (SYD, BNE, VIC) and a lot of times in SFO, NEV, AZ, ORE etc.. the last one is probably the best because we were almost complete and we were with Kenzo (too bad Liam is still a baby) .

I wished we can also do this again and maybe with Liam next time, I am kinda doubtful, i feel, but if not with me at least  mum can bring them

 

 

 

 

Hope

I was told that Kenzo debated with his Aunt Ting and he insisted his momsie ain’t going to get well anymore and when asked how he got that idea Kenzo pointed at me.

Yes, I must confess, I told him that. That was when we were about to visit momsie and just to set Kenzo’s expectations on what he is going to see and what momsie current state was. I told him that she is very, very sick and to see momsie well and doing stuff with him that they previously did together will not happen anymore, never. I guess, I am just being to realistic on my assumptions and did not bother to sugar coat it with fairy tales. I am often honest to Kenzo and I would want to talk to him like an adult and that assumption that momsie is ain’t well is an example of those convos.

But really, momsie is not well and will never be. No one can deny that it is all going downhill.  And this got me thinking when do the love ones decide that it is over? That all the expenses is for naught.That we are just burning all our cash for nothing. That all our life saving will just be handed over to the doctors, therapists, hospitals and drugstores. I think ending up losing the battle and quite broke is a double blackeye, not considering the stress and the tension we carry everyday due to it. But really this is an emotional decision and not a logical one. Love, I think, will mostly prevail over cost and realities.

We all want momsie well  and hoped that all of the suffering she has now did not happen but, truth be told, she might not recover well from it. Maybe in time he can say a few words again, maybe a “hello” and “bye bye” or walk 5 steps or lift 2 fingers from her right hand. Sadly but I think that is around about it. Based on her current state maybe we are just waiting for the second or third strike of another stroke and that is it. We are delaying the inevitable and just waiting for that next hit. It is not being pessimistic but based on the damaged her body is in now, looks like it is going to be close to impossible that she can be back.

But fortunately I am not God. I really don’t know and just basing my guess on probabilities…  and hopefully I am wrong.

 

 

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Celeb

Liam has been getting quite an attention in the mall. At first I cannot beleive it or perhaps a fluke but it seems like almost everyt ime these past few days strangers are approaching Liam and even would take his picture.

They say he is so cute, handsome etc. One thing about Liam is he is very approachable and warm to people. He likes the attention and welcoming strangers is part of him.

I posted it before that the world is made for friendly people. School, work, friendships etc are easy for the outgoing and fortunaely that is what Liam is.

Really hope that he will be this way till he gets old, with that warm glow in his face and a sincere nice smile to partner it with.

The clingy one

Liam is the clingy one while his brother tends to be more independent but at the same time  want to get all the attention. .Liam want those warm physical contacts, mostly when sleeping or taking a nap which is not the case for Kenzo.

In a way, it is such a sweet thing but the problem arises during the middle of the night when I am about enjoying my sleep,   and when he will tuck himself to me thus waking me up.

By default since I am a light sleeper, mum gets to sleep with Liam on most nights because she can always go back to sleep immediately. But during those days where mum is very tired and wanted uninterrupted sleep she will ask me to switch and I will be the one to shoulder Liam’s “sweetness”.

Indeed, Liam has this sweet, friendly personality. It is all sunshine with him. Unlike Kenzo, when Liam wakes up he is already smiling and in a minute he will say “HI”. He can surely lighten up your morning seeing him like that.

 

 

Picky eater

kenzo still has not outgrown his milk and have not ate anything really considered real food. He often feast on junk food and sweets, good thing we have taught him how to brush his teeth often that is why he still has a good set, but some are starting to have cavities.

He loves Pancakes ( he call them Tubby toast as it looks like the telletubbies’ food), vienna sausage, Pan De Sal, but other than those it is all junk food.

Now Liam is learning how to eat mashed veggies, Kenzo is now in a way forced to compete and also would share Liam’s food. So, as we start Liam on solid foods Kenzo is starting too.

Just this morning, We spread Nuttela on his bread and since he dont know Nutella yet, he obviously refused and just want his Pan De Sal. Then we made an act of making a Nutella sandwich for Liam, and him sensing this would give Liam an upper hand in the eating race he agreed to try and loved it.

We are just about around the starting line on this race to make him eat real food. We envy other parents that make their kids eat but what we can we do, we got the most picky of all. But the nice thing now is we are slowly moving in the right direction, though too late and a bit of a crawl, and hopefully it’ll stay that way.

Two kids

Having two kids is a lot different than having one, other than the usual difficulties of more expense, additional work etc, the one other thing that we have to learn by having kids is how to decide on who will take the larger share of our attention. Right now, it is not yet much of an issue as Liam is too small to compete but in about a year time I know we are up to face a competition.

Right now, we often observed that Kenzo is often wanting to get all the spotlight away from Liam. He wants all the glorious applause to be on him, which of course Liam cannot fight for yet.

Lately, If Kenzo would see Liam playing with his baby’s toys he would always get it and tell him to share; but when he is the one playing with his he wont give Liam a minute to play with it.

Eating is also a time for Kenzo to compete, ever since kenzo is a picky eater and would not really try most food unless it is covered with chocolate. Now Liam is starting to eat and he notice that Liam is getting an audience for it. And As any big brother would do he would want to eat Liam’s food too, in fact he almost solely ate Liam’s crackers and shared his Gerber occasionally.

Now the quandary is, how to balance praises, attention to them; balancing anything is difficult and I am sure this one will be no exception.

Liam and Kenzo has two different personality and in fact, quite opposite they have good points and bad, just like all of us… but really how can we balance the hugs, care and love equally to them? I guess it is not possible but we will just try our best.

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