everyday with my son

Small stories of how it all went along

Archive for the month “May, 2017”

Groundbreaking

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Just last week we had an groundbreaking but I was not able to attend because I am sick ( I am still sick). It started with slight fever in the afternoon and a full blast diarrhea 2 days after. I got very, very weak when I got dehydrated, I can hardly stand. Sunday of 2am I was rushed to Asian Hosp. and they put IVF  in me, but 3 days after that I am better but not well and still suffering from diarrhea.

Back to the story, it was the day of our groundbreaking and it officially started the house. We are a bit anxious because we are always dreaming of what our life is going to be at the new place. We are full of nice thoughts on how we are gonna spend parties, get together, weekends etc.. and what new house fixtures and furn to buy. It is all happy times until…

This morning I visited the site and was informed by Ryan our Foreman that the neighborhood has been siege a number of times by house intruders for years. He had talked to the people there and was told about it. This kinda dampened our happy times about the house, now we gotta work around the dangers of the place and might need to add fortress like fence system to protect us. We probably have to consider to buy a gun, alarm system, CCTVs etc. Now the whole paradigm has shifted.

We thought the place was safe but I guess it was not due to the presence of Squatters on the other side of the street (though a neighborhood gate separates us), we thought since it is not far from barangay hall,  and police station it can be safe but I guess it was not.

NO choice but we just have to live around it. No way to back out now, we just gotta prepare and keep vigilant as often as we can.

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We celebrated a birthday

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Mum’s birthday was yesterday and it was kinda tough because of how RAMBUNCTIOUS Liam and Kenzo can be. When I was told that we are gonna eat out I suggested that it is perhaps better to eat at home, take out some food from a resto and enjoy at the comforts of our home. I am worried that if we eat at a nice resto there might be a chaos–named Liam and Kenzo that we might not be able to handle.

We all started at about 6pm and by around 6:30 we are all at the tables deciding on what to eatr. It is a nice Casual Dining place called Yabu and the ambiance is nice, lighting subdued and other diners are fairly quiet. Then in a few minutes  they both started to make the chopsticks as their drumsticks and later as a harry Potter’s wand. A while after they shifted to  walk over the long couch, climb the seats, fight for M&Ms, playfully act around, shout, fake cry and what really made it worst is when they both grabbed the Mango Juice at the same time and spilled it.

It is both a gift and a curse to have active kids and what I learned is that it is better to lay them off nice restos where you have to wait for a long time for the food to be served, it makes them cranky and they are like a wound up rubber just waiting to spring out. I think they can handle Fast foods where we dont have to spend a long time. It is like order, eat and head out.. to a toy store.

 

Another year

Another year has passed that add another year to this blog. I started this when Kenzo is about a year and a half old and now he is to turn 7 by Oct and now we have Liam along with us.

Currently I am with Kenzo downstairs.  He is eating some snacks and watching Ryan Toy Review on youtube while Liam is upstairs taking a nap.

BTW, today is mum’s birthday and I think there would be some fancy dinner at the mall tonight.

Well, hope to edit all my previous post to make it readable but looking back at it it looks daunting.

Hope all will be good for another year. I hope for another trip and we are all exicited how the house will look like when it is done.

Ciao!

Haus Construction

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We are in the first couple of weeks in our house construction. And a few of my ideas I wanted to be adopted, it is more of a long term plan and it is more on necessity than style.

Reason why I agreed to buy this house it is because it has a separate lot that I can sell when Kenzo or Liam entered college. It is more of a college fund or investment whose value will increase with inflation and by the time Kenzo or Liam is in college the selling price of the lot is hopefully equal or more than the cost of college fees. I also made the house design with the future option to sell in mind. Like the location of windows, doors, entrance and even the front setback that we can also be converted to a carport should we sell the other lot.

But it turns out not what I expected. Mum is not to keen on selling the other lot, she just let me believe that she likes my idea just to go on with the house construction. Now the house has an overhang that encroach on the other lot. Windows are above the property line, I hoped it has a setback or an allowance so we can still open our windows should we sell the other lot.

I want the house to be in line to a minimalist style where we keep only important stuff inside the house to avoid clutter, accumulation of dust and to make it easy to maintain and clean. I prefer minimalist so that in the future we wont have to be dependent on a househelp. A house where we dont have too much stuff lying around, furniture that can be easily cleaned, open spaces, less house decors (that are just a big magnet for dust). We also need to limit our clothes and stuff that we keep.

One idea that I had recently  was how Jobs and Zuck wear the same style of clothes almost always and I realized that we can do that with our bedsheets and curtains etc. Truth is we dont need a bedsheets, pillow cases that is different every month. We can just keep about 3 sets and just alternate them. Too bad I bought several sets maybe about 10-12 already when I was in the US… well, maybe I just have to sell them perhaps.

It is hard to make someone a minimalist, we have a tendency to keep things and put heavy sentimental values to our things. We like to hoard and make boxes filled with memories that we wont bother to check again,  except only when you are very sick and about to die. We tend to over-appreciate our stuff, no matter how old and useless it is, and will not let go. Problem with this it will accumulate dirt, gather dust and become a nice home for little insects and pests.

I have been trying to make mum towards this but I am hardly making a dent, but I am still pestering her and still trying.  

I dont intend to keep a househelp, I feel it is a form of slavery and I dont really feel good about it… but having a maid is ingrained in our culture and maybe there are only a few of us who wants a home or willing to live without it.

Convincing Mum to  not have a house help is the hardest thing, as I said it is already ingrained in our culture, and it is even quite unheard of to think of not having one. 

I want all the important stuff settled first before thinking of the aesthetics. I prefer to make sure the house will have strong, continuous water before thinking about the nicest shower head, toilets etc. I want the house to be solar powered so we can freely use ACs to fight humidty. I think even with the most expensive exterior paints, interior design etc will mean nothing if the house is uncomfortable and humid. I believe an ugly house with AC trumps a nice house with poor ventilation.

We are just starting with the house and issues and disagreements are coming out, our ideas clashed and a common ground is often hard to reach. Well, goodluck hope will be able to finish this and set out roots in our new house.

 

II

problem with house construction is laymen don’t have the expertise to know what is standard measurement in construction. We cannot make the computations of loads, lateral loads etc on our own. We have to get another opinion of another engineer to determine if our house is within standard.

For example: Using of a 5′ CHB instead of 6′ for external wall, I was told that since it is just a small house a 5′ will do. Now there is now way to know if that is true or the contractor is trying to save cost to increase profits.

Wall spacing of vertical rebar,  I read ,to make house stronger should be 40cm but when I asked about this they said the standard for a 2 storey house is 60cm, then again I have no way to know this.

If anyone is gonna have a house constructed it is better to detailed all the specs you prefer on your house or get a standard quote from the con\tractor and asked it upgrade the materials to make the house stronger. Increase the size of hollow blocks, if they quote that they are gonna use 4′ CHBs upgarde it to 5′. If they told you that they are gonna  use a 10mm rebar, asked them to use 12mm etc…

Contractors incentive is to quote a low price so clients will give them their business, they  then will try to cut corners to increase profit.

It is a tough position to be in especially when you just youtube and google trained kind of a handyman.

Snappish

I am off Zolodin, my own decision to stop, and I often find myself being irritable, impatient and snappish. Since I am often with my kids they get the load of my “attitude”. I am giving them a hard time all because I am battling my inner demons and a load of crap on my shoulders that is now getting heavier as days go past.

I am now not  being a good parent and I know I am more of a liability than am asset in my family.  I shout at Kenzo , will show him my disappointment and disgust in him when he did wrong.  I get irritated when things gets hard, when play becomes to aggressive and they wont stop, i get frustrated and I will snap.

It is not a life I should be giving to both of my kids, not a parent that I should be…

 

GOT AN APPROVAL

I got an approval from Mum to “SNIP LIFE OFF THE ROOTS” (if it is vague, that is my intention to try to cover it up and make it sound cute.).

We were driving together and we touched on the topic of house construction. I asked about how is the loan going? because right now (2 May 2017) we already started construction but it is all from the savings account and not from the loan. Without the loan we will end up with just a few post, walls and not a real house because we dont have enough money to complete the house. So, that loan is very important, but right now what we got is a bank assurance that they are going to give the money but not the actual money.

So I said, doomsday scenario will be the money from the bank will not arrive and we will end up with just walls and holes on the ground. Mum hated me for being too negative, she said my pessimism affects her and pull her down. She said, if I am going to be like that (negative) it is better for me to “SNIP LIFE OFF THE ROOTS” (she did not say that exact words.  what she said was  a very direct reference to deed). I got a bit excited because at least your mum will be one less person I will be guilty about.

Then we discussed how the husband of their client’s did it, she just asked me not to do it in our house and car.. that is all her request but she really said I think it is ok for me to go. I told her about how I planned to do it and she even suggested a few things but I offered my inputs about what would be the least painful way to “SNIP LIFE OFF THE ROOTS” hahaha.. that again, huh? maybe by now you hated that phrase already.

KENZO AND LIAM

I have to do it, I am tired. of course I want to stay longer and see both of you grow but it is really tough for me, very tough.. see even your mum approved of it… 🙂 as they say, mothers knows best and I think on that minute her advice was spot on. bye hopefully real soon.

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