everyday with my son

Small stories of how it all went along

Archive for the month “October, 2016”

Problems: house construction


As they say, “do not celebrate until the fat lady sings.”

When we thought all of the hard part  was  over and that we are gonna start our house construction we were faced with a serious and a bit costly problem that can threaten our project to another long process or worse–non completion.

We started the project with a trip to the contractors house to discuss the design that we wished to have. Now my mindset there is to suggest a design that will fit our budget but mum has another idea (which I allowed her to follow) is to make the best design without much consideration to our budget and just let the Architect and Contractor to adjust and make a budgeted version.

I was really against this plan and I was uncomfortable with it but since I dont have  much active voice in the project I just allowed mum to have his way, I try to interject and protest  but I  will be blocked with “e di ikaw mag bayad ng loan.” , that kept my silent.

Few weeks after the design was completed it was very nice and looks way over the budget. Now the Architect assured as that the price tag of 8M was overstated for loan purposes only and they will just downgrade the finishing/ materials and fit it to our budget of 3.2M. But still even with this guarantee I was concerned, that how can you downgrade an 8M house to 3.2M, I kinda doubt it and from time to time I voiced out my fear to mum.

That assurance that the house will only cost 3.2M is a releif to us, so we proceeded to submit the plans and went to a lengthy, tedious process of a bank loan. We waited for weeks and was given a go signal.  Then we have to meet with the contractor again, to finally start the project. They will bring us the final break down of the project and it should be 3.2M, give us the contract and set to meet again to pay them, sign the contracts and build.

But when I met them, my worst fear was realized, they cannot downgrade a 8M house to 3.2M the lowest they can go is 5.1M. We paid them 60K to make those plans for our purpose but that plan is now useless and our money burnt.

The plan B left with us was to look for a contractor that can downgrade it to fit our budget or redo the whole project, pay another 60K for the design and spend another 2 months of processing it.

“it aint over till it is over.” Prior to all of this confusion mum is always giddy and almost celebrating  that we are to have our house, even if construction has not started, while I am not for I know it is still not a house until it is really finish. I am more of waiting it to finish before celebrating and now with this new development mum was quite stressed for all she thought we went over the hardest part and not knowing that all is about to get harder.




Mum noticed that Kenzo was squinting when he is looking far. It seems he can not see very well when stuff are far and small.

I noticed that already about a year ago but just ignored it, but since mum noticed it as well, maybe it needs to be checked.

I dont remember having eye issues during highschool and elementary. I think my eyesight are normal but after high school, it started to deteriorate at a fast rate. I started using glasses was when my myopia was at 1.25 and almost evrey year or two it will increase and now I am past my 40s, I am at 7.00 and with it is a serious case of astigmatism.

None of my nearest relatives has this much eye problem, maybe just my cousin Ate Fe but most has really good eyesight. My case is surely genetics, there is not enough reading, watching TV, or checking soc med that can damage my eye this much, so it must be genetics.

Now  did I transferred my poor eyesight to Kenzo? If I did then soon he’ll have to wear glasses, sadly.

I also knew that Kenzo can be good athlete, he is very active, very strong, has good fast twitch muscles, and competitive.

I planned to send him to different sports classes and hopefully be able to progress and one day he’ll be a student athlete and get free school fees. Now if he has to wear glasses sports that he can join will be limited, goodthing he is into swimming and maybe that will be his sport. Unlike basketball, Taekwondo, Judo and football (which is i like for him to try) swimmers is not a disadvantage if they are wearing googles with prescriptive lenses. In swimming they dont have to use their peripheral vision as much.. so maybe this will be his sport.

We will bring Kenzo to his Tito who is an opthalmologist soon and have it checked, hopefully he wont have to use glasses yet and perhaps if he really need to, maybe till around around college but (please) not during his childhood. years..

The “word”

It was said . The “word”.

During a conversation about something trivial, and my fault for  using a sarcastic tone made mum to dare me and say, “eh di, hiwalayan mo na ako.“.  It is a statement that was not meant as a joke, was not meant to just deflect and stop the conversation, it seems to me ir is a dare or perhaps a request or a wish.

I cannot blame mum and I agreed with her. I knew I have not been doing my responsibilities and I am nothing but a dead weight. Right now, mum is under a heavy pressure on her job, her mum’s health, expenses related to her mum, her dad’s health and his 2nd,3rd,4th(?) families. It is a tough year for us, it would have been nice but what happened to her mum blasted everything to pieces. Her work suffered, our Pru Life UK income almost nil. She is now in the bottom of the valley with regards to her work. and in the middle of all that difficulties I am there creating another big one for her to load on her shoulders.

Yeah I agree that I should go. Life will be better for everyone if I am gone. I really hope that things did not turn our to be this way, and wish it was better… sorry kids.


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