everyday with my son

Small stories of how it all went along

Archive for the month “January, 2016”

Balancing act

I think I wrote it in this blog  before that balancing is a tough thing to do, sadly most of parenting two kids is about balancing. Things like gifts, rewards, compliments and even punishments has to be equal and fair. One should not get more than the other but in reality that never happens. What happened everyday are estimates of what is fair and depending on how bad or a good day it was.

If we give too much to Kenzo it will make him spoiled and Liam will feel unloved. Give too much to Liam and the effect will be reversed.

In the past few days we have been a bit hard on Kenzo. We reprimand him if he hurt his brother or his actions can possibly hurt Liam. We maintain control of the situation with threats of and actual punishments, scolding and very loud  nags from his mum. In our effort to make things easy and safe for Liam we sacrificed Kenzo’s fun. We are hoping that if kenzo learnt to share, stop doin or his flying kicks when around his baby brother,  just be a big brother and not a bully to Liam all will be good, unfortunately we are teaching this in a hard and possibly outdated way.

I personally feel one day this will have an effect on Kenzo hopefully not but the way all are escalating i think it would have one day. Those threats and punishments which happen everyday can be taxing and emotionally painful. I make him cry so that he will listen and follow, I will let him out of the room as his punishments for bad behavior while his mum will threaten him that he will be unloved, not be bought toys etc.

As his unacceptable actions happened everyday sometimes twice or thrice,  a few times just once and seldom never in a day, Kenzo get his dose of scolding about around that much too. It is sad to reflect that all had come down to this and our once loved kid is now in the middle to getting our wrath.

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Throwing

Liam has a habit of throwing things, he has this since he was a baby and now he has grown to a toddler he has not outgrown it. If he is examining a wallet, for example, and he sensed that you are about to get it from him he will throw it far right before you get it from him. If he is holding a metal that can hurt him I will naturally run to get it from his hands but before I get a hold of it it is far from the both of us.

He also drop stuff from his crib, like bombs from an aircraft he will drop most things from his crib–whether they are toys, Ipads, phones or pillows.

but the worst part that happened when he threw something and it landed on Kenzo, me  or anyone ‘s face. There were countless times I would see his Mum or Kenzo cry in pain because a gadget smacked their head.

That is his things and even though we say no to stop him he cannot understand it yet. I hope this will be a phase on he will outgrow it soon otherwise we are facing a futire of broken windows, Tvs, Phones etc.

 

Pacifier

Liam is getting too comfortable with his pacifiers. I think he wont sleep without it and during the day he prefers to have that rubber plug on his mouth.

I think having that habit makes him slow in learning to talk. His speech is somewhat slow compared to his brother but he can point to things and understand simple instructions. We got a picture book and he can point and recognize animals like frog, fish, duck, dog cat etc and things like bed, shoes, clothes, food, car, sky etc.. but not saying them.

I wished to hear him talk soon, as I dont want him to be delayed compared to his peers but his pacifier is an easy way for us to relax him. His pacifier is like a sleeping pill that makes him snooze and we are now in a bind on how to slowly wean him away from it.

His mum planned to wean him away from his habit but no progress so far, hopefully one day we can hear him say a lot and reason loudly like a real young boy.

De Ja Vu

And we are starting to get the ‘Kenzo’ feel once again with Liam, which we first thought Liam will be a tamer version of his brother but these past few months we were slowly uncovering his ROWDY personality.

Like his brother he gambol, skip and hop around the room. He will climb high chairs and jump on top of the bed. He is about doin’ what Kenzo did before.

I spent a few hours taking care of him yesterday and I now realized how handful he had become. He is getting stronger and faster as week passed and his activity becoming a bit on the danger side. Just like before, we are now scared of him getting into a serious accident or crashing into something and breaking it.

We are now faced with the truth that we have two very active boys. They are almost a copy of the other (with a few differneces) and in a way, somehow, silently and slowly it is scaring us.

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