everyday with my son

Small stories of how it all went along

Archive for the month “November, 2015”

Happy Personality

I think personality is mostly inborn and we are gifted with either extrovertness or introvertness, I can see from how Liam’s and Kenzo’s personalities take shape as they grow older. I dont think we have a hand in shaping those as they progress without us doing anything. It just take shape in front of our eyes, seemingly overnight.

Liam is now uncovering himself one by one. I think he has a more outgoing personality spirit than Kenzo. He accomodate strangers with a hearty smile that pull people to him. I can see him to be really friendly and good natured, unlike Kenzo who tend to be more aloof and independent.

The world was shaped by extroverts, and introverts have difficulty fitting in. Liam I think can survive the world and breeze thru it with is happy self. Kenzo, on the other hand, is a bit dettached to strangers but it does not mean it is a flaw, in fact it serves him quite well as he became more observant than other kids. I think since Kenzo is often on the sidelines of things, and not in the middle like liam, he sees things in a different way, like in sports a player sees the game differently from his coach and there is no view that is automatically better than the other.

Liam has really turned to a superstar and his friendly ways can grab the spotlight towards him, people gravitates to him as he parade his shinny self.

I hope Liam to keep his ways and be more like his mom… and make everybody fall in love with him.

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Rosario

Just like that it ended. It happened so fast and we are all caught unaware. Nov 3 at around 11am I got a call from Raymond informing me of an accident involving my mother. Initially, details are sketchy and vague. Info starts to pour in after a few more minutes until the news of her death got to me.

It was a rushed situation, I was needed at the hospital to make some decision and to sign some paperworks. I was not able to get sooner as I have to wait for Tereh and the problem of squeezing thru manila’s traffic made my arrival in the hospital quite late, it toook me about 3 hours to get there.

When I reached the hospital she was dead. our relatives and her friends was there waiting for more news and my arrival. AFter that all just went at a faster pace and finding myself identifying her body in the morgue and deciding on what casket my mother will be put in. At around that moment I am faced with the truth that she is gone and will never see her again.

Me and my Mother almost never see each other ‘eye to eye”. We dont hate each other but we just dont see things in the same way. Maybe it is the age gap or probably information gap. What I know is not the same as what she knows. How I understand is not how she understands. It is a complex situation and me or her was not willing to budge. We clash on many things but goodthing it dont escalate into a fight or a war. It is a ‘nice to irritated’ kind of relationship but fortunately it dont really get to a hateful situation.

I never really had a bonding momment with my mother and we never really hug or kiss like any parent-son relationship and I think this made our relationship at “arms-length” kinda thing.

Looking back, she may not be the best mother to me but she is a really great lola. If there is something I truly regret now it is that opportunity where I missed giving her more chance to be a lola to my kids. She was a great lola but due to my complaints of the travel time, traffic etc I was not able to get my kids see their lola more often and that is really crushing. I failed to recognize at that time that she wants to see and enjoy her grandkids and to give a chance to my kids to know their lola well.

That cliche ‘if I can turn back time’ is overused but really it is the only thimg I would wish for at a situation like this. I would wish for a better things, better time, less time to hate and more time to care.

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