There is nothing worst than seeing your son that is sick. It is a mixture of fear, pain and saddness.
After days of having a fever, we had kenzo admitted to Asian Hospital. It is something we dread but we got no choice. His fever will go up and down, LBM also followed that made him dyhydrated and slightly weak. Yesterday morning, rashes started to show on his body & we knew that he needs to be admitted.
The few hours that followed was a blanket of unknowns. My mind was filled with a brew of what ifs and worry.
It was a silent ride to the hospital. No recitals of “Kenzo, where is the Gas station”? “is that a truck?” “Where is the bus?” nothing of that sort.
When all the initial medical procedures were done and doctors decided that he will be admitted, I felt heavy. I worry about the worst and how it will be difficult for his body to handle the thick needle of an IV fluid. I am also worried about his activity, I know that he cannot be connected to an IV for a long time without having an itch to gambol around.
And when the doctors knock on the door with a tray of IV stuff I started to worry. I know I cannot stand there and witness Kenzo’s pain. I know the right thing to do is to be there and go through it with him But I did not. I cowardly walked away and left my son with his Mum, Lola and Yaya.
The whole time I watched my son uncomfortably connected to an IV, and when I witness him vomit the soup he took and how his eyes rolled when that happened it sent panic in me. It is like a bolt of something that hits my feet and rush of blood run up to my head. It is a weird and very sad feeling and incomparable to something I had before.
I dont want this whole episode to happen again. I cannot stand it and I am worried to death. The silver lining to all this, It is just a strong fever and nothing that a few days at the hospital wont fix. It is not something that needs elaborate medical procedure… and that is something I have to be thankful for.
I just hope this whole event will end soon. I just want, if possible, to just sleep through it and wake up when it is all finished… or maybe better yet if all were just a silly dream.
I hope my son get well soon and I cannot wait to see him in his usual active self.